GenMe Helpful Quotes

This is a bit of a cheat-sheet for all of you, showing you specific quotes from Generation Me that should get you thinking about how the book is written and what Generation Me thinks about different issues. If you didn't read the book, consider this me being nice and giving you an out.

Good luck!

Generation Me Quotes

Chapter 1: You Don’t Need Their Approval: The Decline of Social Rules

·       “Melissa, 20, who says, ‘I couldn’t care less how I am viewed by society.  I live my life according to the morals, views, and standards that I create.”

·       “Kids are being encouraged by pop culture to be disrespectful and self-destructive, and their parents are frightened and looking for help” p.26

·       “[I]n 1989, …97% of high school students said they had let someone else copy their work.” P.27

·       “Classrooms are increasingly structured for teachers to be ‘facilitators’ rather than authority figures.  Lecturing is frowned upon; ‘collaborative learning’ is in.” p.29

·       “Generation Me believes … the individual comes first.” P.43

Chapter 2: An Army of One: Me

·       “Generation Me is the first generation raised to believe that everyone should have high self-esteem.” p.53

·       “[W]e handle children much more delicately … They feel good about themselves for no reason.” P.57

·       “[M]any educational psychologists believe that schools should be ‘places in which children are insulated from the outside world and emotionally – not intellectually- nourished.  … My colleagues always referred to the importance of making kids feel good about themselves but rarely, if ever, spoke of achievement, ideals, goals, character, or decency.” P.64

·       “Far from being altruistic and focused on others, the Millennials are the most narcissistic generation in history.”p.70

·       “ ‘[S]tudents learn that they do not need to respect their teachers or even earn their grades, so they begin to believe that they are entitled to grades, respect, or anything else … just for asking.’ “ p.71

Chapter 3:  You Can Be Anything You Want to Be

·       Scot: “ I feel like it is very important to be your own hero” p. 72

·       “Most American parents begin asking their children their preferences before they can answer” p. 75

·       “”Jobs are no longer jobs, they are lifestyle options.” P. 80

·       “If a young person ‘never gives up, then he or she will never have to admit to failure” p. 82

·       “We are a generation with a few shrinking violets.” P.89

·       “They’re not just looking for a job. They want something that’s more like a calling, that’s going to be an expression of their identity.” P.98

Chapter 4: The Age of Anxiety (and Depression, and Loneliness): Generation Stressed

·       “Our growing tendency to put  the self first leads to unparallel freedom, but it also creates an enormous amount of pressure on us to stand alone.’ P. 109

·       “Our roots are not deep enough, our support systems too shallow.” P 115

·       “For the first six months after (business)  school, I couldn’t even get an administrative position.” p. 118

·       “Most families have been able to stay afloat mostly because both adults are in the workforce” p. 125

·       “So in this world where essentials like housing are so astronomically expensive, what messages has GenMe been fed?... we have been taught to expect more” p. 129

·       “We focus so much on our individual wants, feeling empty inside, that depression is often the result.” P.134

Chapter 5: Yeah, Right: The Belief That There’s No Point in Trying

·       “There’s an election coming up, and her parents plan on voting in it.  “Why are you going to vote?” Caitlin asks. ‘You’re more likely to get into an accident on the way to the polling place than to have your vote affect the election.’ ” (p. 137)

·       “Older people complain that the idea of personal responsibility has faded, that young people blame others for their problems, and that apathy is rampant.  We’re not just Generation Me; we’re Generation Whatever.  The young are the new cynics” (p.137)

·       “Kids as young as 9 have caught the rising wave of apathy and cynicism.” (p.140)

·       “One professor at a “socially progressive” college said that the students on his campus ‘whine about the lack of action in the classroom or on campus, then back down when challenged or encouraged to use the resources at their disposal.’ “ (p. 141)

·       “For GenMe, there is no such thing as ‘selling out,’ since we never aspired to change the structure of society in the first place.” (p. 143)

·       “We also lack faith in government and politicians.  The days where people believed we could eliminate poverty and war are long gone, and every year of GenMe’s life seems to bring a new political scandal.” (p.145)

·       “Educational psychologist Maureen Stout argues that the self-esteem movement disconnects reward from achievement, producing cynical kids.  She points out that 5- and 6-year olds start school eager to learn, but that ‘when they encounter teachers who give them an A just for turning up in class….they have no choice but to become cynical about the education process.’ ”(p. 148)

·       “Our parents and teachers told us how special we were, but they skimped on the lesson that life isn’t fair.” (p. 149)

·        “Sacks reports with irony that he had to throw out his ‘traditional approach to higher education whereby teachers assume students take responsibility for their decisions.’ ” (p.154)

·       “Youthful excuse making was probably common in other generations as well, but back then, parents took the teacher’s side.  Now, Perlstein reports, parents don’t back up the teachers more than half the time.” “I’m tired of the kids talking back, the parents talking back, the lack of interest in learning.” (p. 154)

Chapter 6: “Sex: Generation Prude Meets Generation Crude”

·       “In case you haven’t heard, ‘hooking up’ has replaced dating among many young people…” “…hookups can range from ‘making out to full-on sex’ but are most distinguished by being ‘between two people who don’t necessarily have any foreseeable future or even a hint of commitment.’ ”(p.159)

·       “In the late 1960s, the average young woman lost her virginity at age 18; by the late 1990s, the average was 15.” (p. 162)

·       “It is hard to live in a generation where sexuality is acceptable, and have parents from a generation where it’s not.  All you can do is live life according to your generation, because it is all you know.” Andy, 20, says. (p.162)

·       “Just as earlier generations found it somewhat shocking to hear about premarital sex, GenMe is shocked by the lack of it.” (p. 163)

·       “You wouldn’t buy a car you haven’t test driven, would you?” asks Emily, 25. Angela, 23, uses a similar analogy: “Not having sex with your future husband is like not trying on clothes before you buy them.” (p. 163)

·       “Felicita, 19, says, “I strongly disagree with people who say it is not morally correct to have sex before marriage.  Marriage is a promise, but all promises can be broken.  Marriage should not be the reason why someone chooses to have sex—love should be.” (p. 164)

·       “Many Boomers are struck by how today’s young people are so comfortable talking about sex.” (p.165)

·       “The most striking shift in teenage and twentysomething sexual behavior in the last decade is the disconnect between sex and emotional involvement.” (p.167)

·       “Older adults may be surprised by the idea of sex as “recreation,” as if it were tennis or jogging. But many young people see relationships as too emotionally fraught, a dangerous world of feelings and closeness.” (p. 168)

·       “As The Hookup Handbook puts it, “if we didn’t have these instant forms of communication (like text messaging and IM), hooking up would be dating because you’d actually have to put more that just minimal effort into making something happen.” (p. 169)

·       “Not long ago, a high school girl with a ‘reputation’ was a bad thing – now it is a good thing.” (p.170)

·       “Being single is not what it used to be.  Someone who is technically ‘single’ (as in not married) may have been in a relationship for ten years. Many people, especially in the younger half of GenMe, have begun to use ‘single’ to mean ‘not dating anyone.’ ” (p. 176-177)

Chapter 7: “The Equality Revolution: Minorities, Women, and Gays and Lesbians”

·       “This tolerance goes hand in hand with the decline of social rules…We are less likely to believe in moral absolutes, so we are tolerant and accept diversity in all its forms.” (p. 181)

·       “Monique, 21 and African-American, notes that her grandmother went to segregated schools and wasn’t even allowed to play with white children. Although Monique says she has seen racism in her life, her grandmother’s experiences ‘seem like another world. I cannot even imagine having to deal with the issues she dealt with.’” (p. 182)

·       “In a 2000 poll, 70% of high school seniors said that race relations at their school were good, and 72% said they have a close friend of another race.” (p. 184)

·       “Laura, 22, grew up in a poor Hispanic family in Miami and got a scholarship to a prestigious private college in the Northeast. Though fitting in at the college was difficult, she was empowered by the experience. ‘Being from a different generation has given me the opportunity to be educated, to take opportunities and make great things out of them,’ she says. ‘I have come to see myself as a role model for future generations.’” (p. 187)

·       “When my mother graduated valedictorian from her high school class in 1962, she was told the women could be nurses, teachers, or secretaries- that was it. Like most women of my generation, I was told that I could be whatever I wanted to be.” (p. 190)

·       “Studies have found that girls with working mothers are more likely to embrace traditionally masculine traits like ambition and independence.”(p. 194)

·       “While only 30% of the overall American population supports gay marriage, 59%-nearly twice as many- of 18-year-olds do.” (p. 207)

·       “Some teens find their experiences at odds with their religious upbringing. For many, this means that they see gays as sinners, and/or believe that gays can change to be straight. Others find themselves questioning their beliefs.” 9p. 209)

Chapter 8:  “Applying Our Knowledge: The Future of Business and the Future of the Young”

·       “So here’s how it looks: Generation Me has the highest self-esteem of any generation, but also the most depression. We are more free and equal, but also more cynical. We expect to follow our dreams, but are anxious about making it happen. In a recent poll, 53% of high school seniors said that growing up is harder now than it was for their parents.” (p. 212)

·       “A recent Associate Press article labeled the current generation of young people ‘The Entitlement Generation’ and described how young workers want everything ‘right now.’ (p. 214)

·       “They will work hard, but even harder if they are praised and appreciated. This is true of any generation, of course, but it is especially true of GenMe’ers, who were raised on extensive praise and almost expect it.” (p. 217)

·       Where do we go from here?

o   Parents: “junk the self-esteem emphasis and teach self-control and good behavior… do not automatically side with your child... limit exposure to violence…don’t use words like spoiled.” (p. 235-237).

o   Young People: “limit your exposure to certain kinds of TV…avoid overthinking…value social relationships…combat depression naturally…cultivate realistic expectations…get involved in your neighborhood and community” (p. 238-240)